In going back to view some of the topics that I missed, I found the topic of divine healing very interesting. As many, I too have to confess being more than a little skeptical of services where divine healing is supposed to be occurring. That is until one Sunday evening, three short years ago.
On the Wednesday before, I was told by my Christian friend and doctor that there was a rather large mass on the shin bone of my left leg. This was discovered when I was seeking some relief from my arthritis, which was getting worse. She showed me the x-rays, and told me that she feared it was bone cancer. Now, I would be scheduled for a bone scan to find out if the cancer had permeated the bone. Needless to say, I was going through a wide range of emotion, at this point. My dear friend and doctor, did something that not many people have happen at a doctor's appointment, she held my hands and prayed for me.
The next day, the call with a date, just one week away, for the bone scan was received. My non-Christian husband's look of absolute fear did little to calm me. I stood with the phone still in my hand, closed my eyes and gave it all over to God's hands. "Whatever this is, Lord, however this all turns out, I count it all joy. I know You love me, and would not allow anything which is not for my good and Your glory." I did not ask for healing.
My pastor and friends were very upset with me. I refused to pray for healing. To my way of thinking, asking for healing was the same as saying that I was not accepting His will. He knew if He was going to heal me, or not. So, I figured, as long as I accepted His will, He would take care of it, one way or the other. Yes, I know, many have also thought that this was pretty twisted thinking. Still, all I wanted was to be obedient and bent to His will. I had a firm belief that everything would turn out just fine, and that He had a very specific purpose for it all. So, I just relaxed about it, and was full of joy in the firm knowledge that God was in control.
Sunday morning, there was an announcement that a faith healer was going to be at our church, that evening, on her way to
When the call came for those who desired healing, I had no intention of stepping forward. My pastor, however, called me up to the front, and asked for someone to lay hands on me, and pray for me. "Not for healing, you understand, as that is not her desire, but for courage to accept God's will." I was grateful that he was respecting my stance on it all, even if he did not agree nor approve.
I lay on the floor, as other's were, and one of the worship team, Jenny<>
It was much like a relaxation therapy session I had shared years before. Jenny started with my toes, and then moved to my foot, then my ankle. Sitting with her hands on my shoulders, her fervent prayer was blanketing me, from the tips of those toes. As her words moved to my calves, I felt someone's warm hands take hold of my feet. Her prayer did not change or skip a beat. My feet felt the warmth of that touch, and as she prayed, it spread up my legs along with the subject area she mentioned, until even the top of my head felt a warm tingle.
As she finished, we both were still for a few moments. The person who has been holding my feet had left us, and Jenny helped me up. I was feeling rather weak. Being hyperglycemic, I just figured that my blood sugar was getting low due to the strenuous exercise of the praise and worship time. After thanking Jenny, I asked her who had been holding my feet, as I wanted to thank them, also. She looked a bit confused and told me that no one had been there, only she had been praying for me. I didn't say anything, but figured that she had been praying with her eyes closed, so didn't see whomever it was.
As the day came for my trip to
Then, the big wait started. After waiting for almost a month, I called my doctor to find out what was going on with the test results. She promised to look into it, as she had never had to wait so long for that kind of test. The next day, she called. What had taken so long was that the tests were sent to not one, but three specialists. Needless to say, I thought her next words would be that it was indeed bone cancer, and that I would have to loose my leg. Still, I was trusting that if that were the case, God was in control and I was glad to be put through this if it brought glory to Him.
Her next words floored me, and completely destroyed my calm resolve. "The mass that I showed you on the x-rays, was not evident on the bone scan. They couldn't find anything. They had the x-rays, which clearly showed the mass, but on the bone scan, nothing."
I was flabbergasted. She had to repeat what she was telling me in at least three different ways, before it sunk in. The mass was gone. We arranged for me to get another set of x-rays done, just to be on the safe side. "God rewarded your faith, Jude." Doctor Nancy said.
Well, the second set of x-ray was proof that the mass was indeed gone. To this day, I know, in my heart of hearts, that it was God or one of His angles that had been holding my feet, as Jenny prayed. I know, in my heart of hearts, that He took the mass away, because I not only paid lip service to my faith, but when I was faced with the trial of fire, I walked into the blaze willingly and joyfully, ready to do His will.
I would like to say that I never doubted things again, but being human, I still do wonder, want to take the easy path, and feel terribly inadequate to the tasks which He sets before me....at times. At other times, I am still that same woman, full of faith that my shortcomings will in no way prevent Him from using me, blessing me, and allowing me to be a part of His work in this hurting world.
So, there you have it. This story is the third life saving miracle which He has granted in my life. While I am joyful of His love, I am also broken by the wonderment of what I could possible do for Him that would make it all worth His time and effort.
I hope this sharing blesses you, and helps you to know, a little more firmly, that God is very much alive, and is still the God of miracles.
Love in Christ, Jude
